Sunday, April 18, 2010

What did 90 days of solitude do for me?

My therapist recently asked me this and I was puzzled. It did teach me a lot in that I leaned in and really delved into getting to know God and worshipping him on a new level. But what did God really mean for me to learn from it?

Later that night I had dinner with my friend and she said she thought it was preparing me for this journey I went on medically. I was very tired and ill and then hospitalized again homebound with the PICC line and wound vac. All in all it was over 12 weeks before I wasn't homebound and tired and weary.

She's right. I would have probably had a nervous breakdown if it had happened before my 90 Days of Solitude or if I hadn't obeyed and done the 90 Days of Solitude. I was tired and slept a lot and even though I had a lot of help with my house and with the girls there was still a lot of time left in the day. I wasn't mentally capable of a lot of bible study or complicated thought process due to a lot of medicine. Yet I was able to draw peace and not worry because my spirit was full. My spirit communed with God and knew what I needed.

Thank you Lord.


sheri April 19, 2010 at 12:08 AM  

I have a hard time believing God "plans" for your heartache--or any ordeal like you have been through. No doubt, He is all-knowing and all-powerful but I don't think he brings illness or tragedy to us even for the purpose of learning. But I do believe Romans 8:28--He works all things for good to those who love Him. God has prepared you for WHATEVER lies be a light in some dark places...and to draw strength from His light in your dark places. We are never promised a bump-free journey but we are promised strength to make that journey. You were prepared for this ordeal but, more importantly, you are prepared for whatever life brings---both good and bad, not because God has to "prove" Himself thru your trials but because you have chosen to draw peace and strength from Him in your quiet moments in your every day. I don't think your 90 days weren't just about a literal 3 months...but more about a way of life--from "Day One" through forever...And not just for you but for everyone of us who has walked that journey with you thru your blog.

Leah April 19, 2010 at 4:54 AM  

I agree that God didn't cause it but like Job and Peter - they were allowed to be sifted. For other reasons I'll post this week I do think I was being sifted but thus prepared in advanced. God is amazing. Thanks for sharing your wisdom Sheri.

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