Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Days 44, 45 & 46

Have you ever felt hopeless? I have. It was completely consuming, overwhelming and exhausting. I could see myself or someone else or even a relationship falling apart or imploding and there was literally nothing I could do to salvage the situation. Hopeless means without hope - therefore there is no possibility of comfort of success. I have felt that lack of comfort. I have felt ill at ease with the world in general and with those in my life and had zero hope that things would ever get better.

This weekend I started to feel hopeless. And I quickly felt God tell me that I am not without hope. That my hope is within Him. That is the difference between now and then. I realized that while I am still experiencing things that I cannot fix - I am helpless not hopeless. There is a HUGE difference between helplessness and hopelessness. When I realized the difference I was amazed and my faith flourished. When a situation is hopeless it doomed to fail. There is no hope for help to come. Helpless basically means to be incapacitated. To me helpless infers that I can't do anything but help can come. The word even says help will come. My help comes from the Lord, maker of heaven and earth. (Psalms 121:2 NIV)

But what about hope? Without hope life seems empty. How do you turn away from hopelessness? It's not something something tangible we can reach for. At some point - we just have to believe that something positive will happen. I believe in God and I believe that true hope leads to God but even if you can't believe in God yet - find something to hope for. Hopefulness feeds our faith. The bible says, "...faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." (Hebrews 11:1 KJV)

In this scripture, faith is defined as trust, firm persuasion, belief, confidence or conviction. The word substance means assurance which literally means a standing under, support. Thus faith, in relation to hope, is assurance. It stands under and supports our hope. Thus, my hope is only as secure as my faith is strong.

Faith is the principle by which I live. My faith is secure in the gospel of Jesus Christ. I BELIEVE. When I believed and hoped in nothing else I found hope that in Christ's sacrifice. That simple knowledge carried me for years even though my faith didn't seem to grow. But as I spend time with God and pray and study, my faith now abounds. If my faith is secure in Jesus, then it lends to the development of hope that things will get better. As you get closer to God your faith builds - thus your hope builds. As you hope for a better life, better circumstances and for answers to prayer - your faith builds. I know mine has. Faith and hope have a symbiotic relationship.

In the past I have felt hopeless and that fed dissatisfaction and a lack of faith in my life. Today, I still cannot see the answers to the complicated issues I am dealing with but I see and feel God at work. Yes, I do feel helpless. But my faith in God assures me that as I trust in Him and stand on His word, He is there to guide and lead me through and that builds my faith in the things I cannot see but are yet to come.

Today's Reflections: Lord it was a hard weekend. I was angry, I cried, I even felt completely alone. I felt separated and set apart from those I love because of things I cannot explain on this blog. But in the midst of that loneliness You were there. You nourished me with Your love. You comforted me in Your sweet embrace. Thank You Abba Father for Your complete love. I only endure because of You. I only believe in You. Even when the world doesn't make sense, You do. Thank you Lord for opening my eyes and revealing Yourself to me. I never want to grow accustomed to the darkness again. Thank You for giving me hope in the things to come.


Allison November 17, 2009 at 2:24 PM  

Leah, I wish I would have been there for you this weekend. I'm not saying that I could have helped, but just sad that you had such a rough time. I hope you know that if you ever do just need someone to talk to or pray with I am just a text away. Love you girl!

Leah's Other Blog

My "other" blog is more about day to day life with my husband and kids and rants and raves about a variety of subjects. Hope on over.

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